Tuesday 29 September 2015

The Touch


People often use the phrase "Love is in the air". In the past I used to make a mockery of the phrase, total non sense. But on 13th September, 2015 I did come to realize about the truth of the sentence. Now I say it's true. "Love is definitely in the air", I say it friends.
"SHE", the one has once again instigated love inside me, which I had forgotten for the past couple of years. Though she is still not aware of my feelings but she did bring the lovely feelings back to my life.

Getting her phone number was a mere coincidence, thanks to a lovely friend and from there on friendship grew. Meet her twice previously but this time there was something special about her that did completely fool me to fall for her. Her beautiful smile, is enough to strike a pin on my heart and on the day her gorgeous look was an additional strike. When I saw her I felt like watching a goddess. I could barely hide my feelings as her charm carried me away.

We reached our destination, a park in New Town named Eco Park. We started to walk along the beautifully paved grass pathway as she was smiling and chatting with me. On the other hand I was hardly able to compose myself at the beauty of this lady conversing with me. Boating, I convinced her over cycling. She agreed and we moved on for the ride. She feared to get into the boat and I convinced her of her safety, come on I know nothing will happen to her as long as I am there. I got into the boat first and it was her turn. As usual the boat was floating and was in a constant motion and she was having trouble getting into the boat. I watched as she suddenly spoke out "oi haath ta dhor nahole Ami pore jabo(catch my hand or else I will fall)". As soon as I heard it I put out my hand to help her. ............. a complete pause in my mind as I felt her hand in my. I guess I could explain the feeling, "The Touch".


We spend around 20 minutes in the boat and at times the boat shook because of the small tides created by the fast moving boats around. She was screaming with fear and at times laughing, joking and even getting into serious discussions. Every expression of her made my heart go bossom and it was really getting difficult for me to keep control of my free flowing emotions. I made sure that she was comfortable on the boat keeping my emotions in check. I must say, although the ride was the most beautiful one I ever experienced yet.

The ride was over and it was time for "foodies". She wanted to watch the water dance while we were having our delicacies, so we sat by the water bed, watching the water dance and having our food. Time elapsed and we had some serious discussion. My princess was sitting right beside me discussing about her future with me. I could only cherish the moment while I hardly remember everything she said, as i was completely lost in her. Yet there were arguments, points to prove and some secrets revealed (not the one though that you are expecting). Never expect the expected. Hahaha...

Time to leave, she said and my heart sank. Oh god why couldn't the time stop there forever? Why did she had to say that? Couldn't we wait a little longer? Questions as such did arise in my mind but they are just questions without answers in the end. We prepared to leave and I was preparing myself for putting the final nail in the coffin. I had to say it to her today, I thought as we were arriving towards the exit. For one second I was thinking, come on lets do it now and in the next second my confidence was all but lost. Confused I kept on thinking, should I or not? "Come on man, lets do it.........", i convinced myself......................................Lost, not today my mind spoke and i restrained myself from the final move, errhhh. Stupid!!! Idiot!!!! What a golden opportunity lost.

On our way back she had to visit city centre, where her mother was waiting for her. I dropped her at city centre, was not feeling to but had to. I was breaking into pieces when again something brought me alive. The pool car dropped us at the opposite side of city centre. We had to cross the road to enter city centre. Now the space for standing beside the road in order to wait for the traffic to go red was quite high from the ground level. One would feel difficulty while crossing it. I jumped on it to wait for the traffic to go red. As I turned back I saw HER wave her hands indicating me to help her to get over the high area. I once again extended my hands to help her and the rest you know, "The Touch". My mood completely refreshed at that moment as she crossed the road with me. She waved me good bye as we crossed the road. I returned with a good bye and I could see my princess slowly depart and finally lost in the crowd. I thought should I follow her? No was the answer as my phone rang. It showed "MOM" calling... Yeah on my way home, was my answer.

Well that night I could hardly sleep as I kept on strolling through her fb photos, messages sent by her on WhatsApp. I just couldn't forget the moments we shared that day. The boat ride, the water dance, her fear, her smile and most importantly that "TOUCH"....

The untold feelings for "HER"

I don't know your feelings for me or even if you have some . You acknowledge me as a good friend, I accept your decision and respect it with a strong heart. Although my perception is different yet I will wait for the day when you finally put the step forward in our friendship. I will be there holding the ground for you so that you can stand firm and never fall. The fear of losing you gives me heartache.. Though I fear that telling you the truth might bring an end to our friendship as well, which I will not be able to overcome.

Please god why do you show dreams that cannot be fulfilled? Answer me.. Sometimes I try to ignore texting her, which is even a tough job than studying, so that she doesn't become a habit. But suddenly after a couple of days a message pops up in my WhatsApp "hey".... What am I supposed to do? She sends a kissy with every text and each kissy makes me even more desperate to make her mine...

I don't know if our destinies are on the same path or not or even you will ever grow the same feelings for me as i have for you. But I always wish you good luck and success in everything you do or wish for as i believe love is always about caring.. I care for you....